There are clearly some events where concentration, focus and attention are no problem – the ones where I am invested in getting to an outcome, where there is a deadline or a pressing need for a decision. Or the ones which have a great facilitator keeping everyone engaged and moving the process forward. The ones where I show up prepared, interested, energized and ready to go! At the other end of the spectrum there are the meetings that I show up for and it’s really clear I shouldn’t be there – and that my best strategy is to exit gracefully (or to excuse the distractions I might get sucked into).
This article is about neither of those extremes – it’s about the in between scenarios. The meetings that I know I need to be at and yet for some reason it’s really hard to keep my attention.
This can be for a multitude of reasons:
- Maybe the content is important but it’s not the top of my personal priority list
- Maybe the role I need to play is important but small and there is a lot of extraneous information where my mind wants to wander.
- Maybe I am just ‘off’ today – I didn’t sleep, I’m not feeling well, I’ve had stress in my personal life etc. etc. etc.
In the best of all worlds this is when I get to reschedule. And sometimes that’s possible and sometimes it’s just not. Particularly when there are multiple players involved.
So, what do we do when we have to be there and need to be focused and want to give our full attention? I personally find it easier to stay present when the meetings are in person (and often they’re not) but even in person I’m not immune to mind-wandering or distractions if my computer is open. I have discovered the following strategies that, while not fool-proof, definitely help me to stay engaged. I’d love to hear others that work for you.
1. Close everything down that is not pertinent to the conversation on the laptop/phone. Move any devices that are not needed, not only onto silent but also ideally out of sight. Similar to not having chocolate in the house if I don’t want to eat it, removing technological temptations makes them less enticing.
2. Have something to play with in your hands. (Ideally this is not something that will annoy everyone else). I have a collection of stones and crystals that I like to fidget with. I know other people who have actual fidgets, or coloring pens to doodle with. If our hands are occupied it can allow our minds to stay focused on the content matter.
3. Take a few minutes BEFORE the meeting to orient (it can literally be 1-2 mins). If there are lots of other things on your mind, write them down so you don’t forget which will give your brain ‘permission’ to not have to keep focusing on them. Take a moment to name to yourself why you are going to this particular conversation – and get clear on what role you are wanting to play and what you want to get out of it.
4. Take a micro-moment to re-energize. This is another ‘before’ strategy but there are multiple ways we can give ourselves an energy shot – sometimes this might be actual energy or caffeine. Sometimes it’s a little movement – a walk round the block or even stretching. Or watching a quick tiktok to relax your mind (before you switch tiktok off!)
Experimentation is key for me – what is working in this moment or week or with this particular group. And when nothing is working then it is for me a sign to start asking deeper questions about what might be going on because, while there always one-offs if it becomes a pattern then I want to ask more questions.
Wishing us all focus and presence as our years start to ramp up with whatever conversations we are engaging in!
